You take the good, you take the bad,
you take them both and there you have
The Facts of Life, the Facts of Life.
I think my theme song would have to be the theme song to "The Facts of Life". Yeah, it was written about teenage girls however with Bi-Polar and Postpartum depression I think there is a point where you have to see that its not just the good or the bad; its that there is a grey world and you need to live with it in order to survive. Its also not that simple to see when you are neck high in an episode and the world seems like there is no where to go but in a downward spiral.
Watching TV as a kid I always envied the way things were wrapped up at the end of a 30 minute episode. When one was depressed, they didn't have to take pills, they didn't have to see a therapist; if they did it was for 10 minutes and the world was a lot better and ended with a group hug of some sort. Unlike reality, one could split up the dramatic episodes so the audience didn't have to feel like it was their reality. It just meant that they could sucker you in for another 30 minutes with 10 minutes full of re-capping. Then end again in a positive note.
Escapism, the cheapest form of mental relaxation for a little girl who's whole life was one of those painful episodes. I waited for the group hug, the "it will be all right", the laugh track to say something, the feeling that everything is ok by some one that loved me, especially my mother. Not one of these came to being. I really felt that nothing was going to be all right. I wanted to wake up in the morning to a different life. Even pretended that I was some of the characters on TV a few times, but could never, ever be what I wanted life to be. Simple and Happy.
I secretly wanted to be Blair. Who did you want to be?
