Two States: The story of my Marriage - the Movie

Good Movie. I have yet to read the book (it was back ordered) however I am reading a lot of Chetan Bhagat's books lately.

After seeing 3 Idiots, another movie based on another book he wrote, I have been on a book journey to read that book, then I found out that it was one of many, so like the bookworm I am, I had to get the whole collection. And not just the kindle books or B&N reader versions. Actual paperback books.

I wonder after I get done reading, what other books should I read?

Sugar Cookies, Cupcakes, Oh My!

Even though I am now officially open as Bella Roux (On Thumbtack) I have been getting bolder about what events I can do for my littles.

For my oldest I am going to make 250-300 cupcakes for her school's festival (pictures coming soon!) and for my youngest I am going to make 200 cut outs of Halloween sugar cookies with icing and sprinkles (pictures also coming soon).

I kind of feel like doing this will open doors for me and hopefully I can make a living in the future doing this full time so I can have time with my littles with out working 60-100 hrs in a cubical.

Feeling like I can do this... maybe...

New Montra

Today is a day where I have to state to myself: "Get up, Get up! Stop feeling sorry for yourself!"

Do know why however its more of a internal conflict than on of dire need to talk out right now. I have these moments every so often however its days like these I have to actually pull myself out of bed and not feel like curling up into a ball and crying.

Okay here I go world. Today is going to be a good day. I have the littles and I am going to learn how to make Sorbet correctly (if I haven't yet talked about my Kokum trials and tribulations, I will soon). Got to get up.

Get up

Up.

NOW AMANDA...

Moving on?

Am I ready to move on?

To face reality of the next chapter of my life.

I have moved on from the X, however not completely. Heather, a personal and dear friend, has told me that if you can be in the same room with him and walk up to him to say "Hi", then have indifferent feelings about looking at him, then you are over him.

I still am at the stage of wanting to punch him in the face a few times still for what he did to the littles.

However, I am almost there.

It becomes difficult when my heart tugs on the strings for some one else. I feel trapped in my world. If I don't think about it, I think about it more and more. I hate that. I really do.

I need to stay rooted in the present or I live in the horrid past or am torched living in a future that does not exist yet and I ignore the people that need me now. My littles, my friends, and family.

And if having the person that I really like as a friend, well good friend, right now is what I need to accept because I really value his friendship and advice then I must come to terms with that as well in the present.

I still need to work on the X thing anyway.

Ladoo Almost Got It

I am happy about my ladoo! Still need to tweak out some small details however I got a great texture and taste.

Here it is:

There are a few mistakes and no nuts *Sigh, waiting for test results for my new allergies*. However I actually made a good 101st try. I am going to make it again however its one of those things worth sharing because I don't have a teacher (an Auntie, Indian mom, or even an old woman that has been doing this for years) to show me how. I have youtube and some culinary school training,

When I got it down I'll show it again. and hopefully I can show another application for Ladoo as well!

Bella Roux Bakery - On Thumbtack

So any one want to hire me for something?? If you are in the San Francisco bay area I can come to your house and help you with your greatest struggles. Either click on this link Pastry by Amanda or in the side bar below and hire me for a cool afternoon of teaching!

Fall

This year Fall came late to San Francisco. I don't mean the calendar Fall that came n time. The actual weather feeling.

I can feel the weather changes. It creeps me out most of the time because one day there is nothing and then the next I notice the switch from one season to the next. I thought since I have new allergies and my body is getting older I wouldn't feel it. However two days ago I did.

It's not a bad thing, just weird. Or at least I think it is.

Does anyone out there feel that slight shift or is just me?