Understanding Hindi

I know I am getting comfortable with the Hindi language, how you ask?

While watching movies, I am falling asleep. To an outsider falling asleep would mean being bored, tired and just rude. However in my brain, its being comfortable with the language.

I do this to the other languages I know, especially Japanese.

I still can't speak Hindi, I am probably at a one year old level (if that), however the next six weeks I'll have time to actually study since school isn't too demanding. And I have to be a tutor for two hours after, which means I'll have down time even more just at school.

My goal is by the new year to at least be at a kindergartner level. Maybe I'll get the Rosetta Stone programs for Japanese and Hindi. However I may have to find some computer engineers to speak Hindi with because there isn't a big Indian community that I know of where I live. I may have to go across the bay for that as well.

Got to get up and start the day.

Tired

I was going to do a vent post about how my life is turning out to be one big mess right now.

However I'm not, can I just say I am tired?

I am super tired about everything. I am tired of what the X has done the last two years and its been hell to get out from under what he has done.

I am tired of what I am putting myself through to make it 100 times tougher and making life a brick wall when it should be an elevator to success.

I am tired of people who say that they'd be there, however not give me a second look when its not convenient to do so for them. I guess I need to start making new friends...

I am tired of not being happy with myself. I am trying each and every day to make myself happy... maybe I should make bread soon. That makes me happy.

I am going to talk with the breads teacher at school and see if I can make some of the breads that I see in the Bread Book for winter presentations at school. I think that will make me happy... I think.

Waking up

Been waking up early. Way before my alarm goes off. I think I have too much on my mind.

From travel, to school, to the littles.

I'll be fine. The world doesn't end or begin with me.

The Bombay dilemma

While watching a Bollywood movie "Wake Up Sid" there was an interesting disclaimer about how there were references to Bombay instead of Mumbai. So I switched tabs and read up a little on history.

In 1990's, while I was half paying attention to the news in the world, a group of people changed the names of several cities in India to be more in line with taking off the shackles of colonialism and other factors going on in their slice of the world at the time.

It makes sense now from what I've been reading, watching, and even the airport code BOM makes sense. I don't know why they'd go through all that trouble to get rid of everything except for a few things. I know its hard to shake off Bollywood as a title, I don't think Mumbaiwood or Mumwood has the same effect on hopefuls trying to make it big in the movies.

In my world Mumbai and Bombay have been two separate places sharing the same space on the map. They exist equally and yet are two separate cities. It will be interesting to see the two cities in person.

Invasion

I've been silent for a few days.
I don't want to be. My blog, my thoughts, and my life. Read the disclaimer...

The X uses this to keep tabs on me. I guess if he'd talk to me with out the little's and his mother at his heals, I would be more willing to talk. Not like he talked to me while we were married.

I may have to go else where to vent. I may or may not use this for anything besides cooking and the sky is blue posts.

I would LOVE to write about my day with out fear of the court appointed judge saying stupid things to my X because he ran to them with stupid ideas in his head put by his mother.

If you are the X and his mother stick to the promise you made a year and a half ago and leave my blog and me alone.

You left me remember? You didn't want to be a 100% husband and a 100% father. You got what you wanted and I am moving on with my life and my children's life. You didn't want to discuss anything with me while we were married. After weeks and months of leaving things up to you, I took charge. You leave things in the air and when decisions need to be made I made them. I am sorry if you felt hurt and not a "man" in the relationship, however you left me and I had to make decisions.

You.
LEFT.
ME!

Get over it and get off my blog.

Step 1

Talked to the MD about my youngest yesterday.

She saw what I see and agreed that Grace does need a specialist to look at her.

I am glad she agreed. At least I don't have the response "She's just 2" or "She's just having an issue with the divorce and just give her time".

I am going to take it one step at a time. Step 2 is the phone interview about the process. I guess its a formality rather than a requirement since the MD could see what I and the teachers see.

It's a relief however a long journey that my small family is ready and willing to do for her.

Step 1 down, a few dozen to go.

Stop eating that...

So for people in the know I have food allergies.

There is one that I know of and its Dairy. Not just lactose, I so wish I could just take a pill and be over it.  And I am going to have to work with it for the rest of my life.

Now on to the hey that makes my skin itchy and why is my throat closing up when I eat this?

Nuts. I guess I am allergic to the world however talking Tree nuts and possibly legumes are now the enemies. *Insert dramatic music* Anyway, at school in Cakes class, my teacher makes a Boston Cream Pie with Cashew Pastry Cream. Any way I was prepared for the Dairy part however wasn't going to put myself into double jeopardy for a small taste of cake... Even if it looks SUPER yummy!!!

Seafood. I'll admit that when I was younger, I had issues peeling raw shrimp or mussels or clams. My hands would break out at the mere sight of under water creatures in Chinatown. But if you cooked them, put a little sauce on them I was all good. When I got a little older my hands stopped puffing up to 20 times it size and I thought I grew out of it. Also I love eating Octopus, Tako in japanese sushi lingo. Found out that my body is allergic to that (Umm NNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!) as well now. Again going to Culinary school has brought me to recognize that when I was handling clams, in the shell, my hands started to break out, again... then I would eat something or even smell it cooking and bam! My nose would start running. Again not realizing that what my body was trying to do was keep me alive.

Talking about that as well, I was told that weight gain was also a sign of the body trying to protect itself from the bad foods. WHEEEE... Figure that after culinary school I should just go on a baguette and water diet for the rest of my life. Unless I prep foods myself.